Galileo Galilei, circa 1600 A.D.

This book is an inquiry into The Question: why is there something instead of nothing? Religion believes that The Answer is the Supreme Being called God. Science believes that the road to The Answer goes exclusively through astronomy, cosmology, and physics. Not so. The road goes through several other places: through metaphysics, through philosophy, through religion, and through each and every one of us. We are all children of the cosmos and have a fundamental right to ask The Question and find an answer for ourselves.

The material presented in these pages is not to be confused with invaluable research being done by scientists. Nor is it to be confused with the abounding scholarly literature in philosophy and theology. Nevertheless the book deals with a fair amount of physics, metaphysics, philosophy, and spirituality.

A word or two about the narrative. The first draft was written through me at a phenomenal pace. It was written during the hours of 9:00 PM to 4:00 AM, it was written over a short span of two months, and it was my first experience with the Writing Muse. Such power she wielded over me that I obeyed her every whim in the fall of 1996. To remain faithful to her I have retained the original fiction structure of that draft as much as possible.

Several readers have commented on the book’s spiritually uplifting and inspirational theme. My hope is that you will be a slightly different person, that you will begin to think differently, that you will challenge basic assumptions, that you will see the universe differently after you read this book. If you are such a reader, please pass it on to your friends.

Although much has been changed for rhetorical purposes, a substantive portion of the inquiry is a personal saga that consists of my father’s thoughts over a period of 50 years. My only regret is that it did not get written in time for my mother to read it. I would like to believe that she would have found the story compelling and perhaps understood him a little better.

Anita’s Legacy is written in loving tribute to my father, Major K.

Thursday, May 2, 1996 was a cool day in the Twin cities. Anita did not wake up at the normal time for school in the morning. She would not wake up ever again. She had died peacefully in her sleep with a smile on her face. It was a heart-wrenching experience for her mother Meg and her father Alan to lose their only child, about two weeks short of her 16th birthday.

When Major Kay, their neighbor down the street, heard the news, he rushed over at once. Major Kay was a 71-year-old retired army officer. Gardening was his hobby, but physics and philosophy were his passion. He had been a good family friend and his grandson, Chris, was Anita’s classmate. Anita used to visit their house frequently.

Nobody, not even his wife or his army buddies had seen the major cry, but on this day Major Kay’s tears could not be contained. He and Anita had been soul mates for several years. They had spent hours together discussing physics, philosophy, and religion. Anita’s kinship with Major Kay was even stronger than her kinship with her father.

Months ago, Anita had told her mother that when she died she was to be cremated. She wanted her ashes to be scattered around Mt. St. Helens in the state of Washington.

At the memorial service held three days later Major Kay was the last to speak. He said: "We all know what a sweet girl Anita was. She touched our lives in different ways during her short stay on earth. I would be remiss in my duty if I did not talk about a facet of her that is unknown to many of you.

"Since the beginning of civilization, people have wondered about the purpose of life and the origin of the universe. We ask ourselves where we came from, why we are here, and where we are going. We desperately look for answers. Science looks for answers in the quest for a single theory that describes the whole universe. Religion embraces the principle of a Supreme Being and looks for answers in the Word of God.

"Anita too was curious about many things. In the 12 years that I have been her friend, she has pestered me with lots of questions. The funny thing about her questions was that they usually altered my thinking and forced me to come up with answers. These answers have given me a totally different picture of the universe and the concept of God. Because of her probing, I believe things today that I would not have dreamed of believing a few years ago.

"Anita was fascinated by astronomy. To her, it was the queen of all the sciences. I cannot forget the gleam in her eyes when she gazed at the heavens. She would wake up before sunrise, and point her binoculars towards the summer triangle of Vega, Altair, and Deneb. Then she would eagerly wait for the constellation Andromeda to rise, wherein lies the nebula Messier 31, believed to be the twin of our galaxy.

"During the last six weeks she was transfixed by the appearance of Hyakutake. The comet is named after an amateur Japanese astronomer who discovered it less than two months before it could be viewed with the naked eye. It literally came out of the blue, surprising, and even embarrassing many respected astronomers. For us in the Northern Hemisphere it was a truly spectacular sight. Anita followed the comet with great interest as it continued to brighten along the northern byway of the sky—from Arcturus to the Big Dipper’s handle, through Ursa Minor, and on into Perseus before fading away from us. I stayed awake with her a couple of nights watching the comet’s mighty tail from dusk till dawn.

"Her death coincided with the day darkness descended on Hyakutake. On May 2nd, it turned around the sun and will be dark for the next two weeks, hidden by the sun’s glare. Like the comets in the night sky, I pray that her soul shines forever in the far reaches of the universe.

"Anita’s favorite smell was rain falling on dry sand. I recall standing outside with her during the first showers this year. As we smelled the sand and became wet, she asked me, ‘Major Kay, what is your legacy in life?’ ‘Anita, that’s for others to determine after I’m gone,’ I replied. ‘No, Major Kay,’ she said. ‘You are a child of the universe and carry your own cosmic legacy. Your spiritual purpose is to find out what this legacy is before you die, not for others to describe it after you are gone.’

"It sounded strange to me the first time I heard it, but not any more. Death comes to us all, no doubt, but before it snatched her away she had figured out her purpose in life. I summarize her legacy by quoting Albert Einstein: ‘Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind,’ he had said. For the last two centuries there has been an ever-widening gap between religion and science, between the mystic and the scientist. The mystic explores reality through meditation; the scientist investigates reality through scientific laws. The two camps are hopelessly separated: the scientist embraces an empirical philosophy that is not religious enough, while the mystic embraces a religious philosophy that is not empirical enough.

"From practicing the martial art of Tae Kwon Do, Anita learned the importance of possessing an indomitable spirit, a spirit that would not be vanquished as she spent her short life repairing the breach between the mystic and the scientist. Her legacy consists of the questions she raised and the answers she provided to narrow the chasm between religion and science.

"She was inspired by Werner Heisenberg, the founder of the uncertainty principle of quantum mechanics, who had once said:

"The developments have certainly been new and exciting. They have unlocked, for me, some of the mysteries of existence. I consider myself fortunate to have been her friend and gleaned her wisdom. You have all heard the saying ‘Whom the Gods love die young.’ The gods loved Anita very much—they sent Hyakutake—a Finger of God—to take her back. She was not of this earth.

"My feelings are best summed up in the words of a fourth century poet:

WHEN the major finished talking, all one could hear was the sound of the plants blooming. After everybody had paid their last respects to the departed soul, Major Kay went over and hugged Meg and Alan. He said to them "Anita’s darkest hours are over. The candle of knowledge can now burn brightly in the dawn of the light she has left behind."

As the sun set and night fell upon the crematorium a swarm of fireflies appeared from nowhere, periodically glowing as though to stoke her eternal fire.